Stressed out

I thought when this whole wedding stuff began it was going to be fun. It's turned out to be everything but. All I ever wanted was what he and I originally planned. A court ceremony, dinner & drinks just he & I. (I even had an entire ensemble for the occasion) A simple coral colored dress, floral headband and a small bouquet. BUT NO.. Once he got a FREE location things seemed to have taken a life of its own.

 

I became excited at the fact that my fiance picked out a dress he thought I would look beautiful in. Seriously wouldn't you feel happy if your guy did that? We bought it, since we had a hall, I figured it would be appropriate to exchange vows in front of family & friends. After several phone calls & disappointments no pastors would marry us unless we were members of their organizations. Neither of us are religious followers, so we stuck with our original plan. Court ceremony. We got our license & were informed they no longer perform ceremonies on Saturday mornings; unless it's the downtown location. Ok, once again it will just be us. I don't think some family members will drive downtown for it... lol

 

We were then hit with the news that due to a huge error, the owner of the hall accidentally gave us a date that was already booked for another party. SO not stressing out (after we told entire family we were doing the reception after all) we decided to change OUR date to keep the hall. NO such luck. No openings unitl February next year. Ok, we were upset & I posted on facebook. Yes I'm an addict.. lol and I'm glad I did within a few minutes my cousin called me & said NOT TO WORRY. "He got me" 2 days later I had a new venue as a gift from my cousin. From then on the whole planning became bigger & bigger. After dozens of phone calls, emails and texts my sisters & brother (because one refuses to have anything to do with it) jumped in and helped me.

 

My fiance & I are on a tight budget, and really want our family & friends to join our celebration. So after a few more disappointments with the food & liquor. We decided to simply do EVERYTHING on our own, our way, at our expense. I received my dress it was huge, having it altered, rings, bouquet, centerpieces, cake, food & music all taken care of. ONLY one thing. I'm not 100% sure of the hall now... (for matters I choose not to disclose)

 

I called a few places last night & was given some prices that are completely way over our budget but the only good thing about is, that those halls come with EVERYTHING. We wouldn't have to do a dam thing except show up.

 

I haven't been sleeping due to being extremely overwhelmed, not too mention I started a new position at the hospital and I drive over an hour home. I come home after 6 every night & just too dam tired to do anything. I have fallen behind in writing my articles & as I sit here crying & typing my soul out. I can honestly say. I don't know what's going to happen next. I wanted our wedding day to be special and filled with joy & happiness with all our family & friends but right now I simply feel like calling the whole thing off and it's all because of 2 individuals who have totally disappointed me.

 

Everyone keeps telling me, you're just stressed out, stop trying to please everyone else, do what's best for you & ralphy (Yes, that's his name) fuck everyone else. Well, after talking with him last night, this man loves me so much & his words to me make me want to marry him anywhere, anyplace, anytime; with that said.. We will continue our court ceremony on the 29th of this month and whatever happens after that is meant to be....

 

Till next time.................. Neena44...............